Life is lonely when you are always right
Insightful Times piece about anger and how getting angry does no good to one’s mental or physical health. It focuses on anger that fuels revenge. I struggle with this—thinking sometimes that it is my job to teach people a lesson. Even if revenge is successfully executed, the other person seldom thinks Oh wow, I was wrong. I shouldn’t have done that. They just get angry themselves, and it’s a never-ending cycle of revenge and fury. Letting it go is so much harder and so much better.
June 30th, 2009 at 7:14 pm
agreed
June 30th, 2009 at 9:00 pm
This article reminded me of another article in the December ‘08 issue of “Urban Dog” Magazine titled “Dogs Don’t Bite When a Growl Will Do.” It talked about a dog who carried on a habit of growling as she was the only female in the litter. As she matured, she continued this habit, but a growl never turned into a bite. It went on to say “…dogs don’t take negative situations and escalate them into total disasters. If only the average person were as nice as the average dog, things would go better for all of us.” I felt like I could relate to this article as I recalled some of the arguments I had with my ex. When an argument would lead to shouting, I have a habit of staying quiet and not responding at all, as I wanted the shouting to stop.
I thought it was cool the way the Times article ended with, “…But such “satisfaction” (referring to revenge-like action) inevitably comes back to haunt us as others are even more likely to remember our insult than we are to relish getting the best of them.” I worked with my therapist to develop a so-called growl response, but I haven’t had a chance to use it, because I haven’t been in an argument in a while… and I need to refresh my memory as to what the growl response was. So next time I come across a situation I’m angry with, I’ll respond with a growl if I remember, or respond with a “blah” or “bygones” and move on. Oh, and not to forget the journal, too. Thank you for sharing an interesting article.