Samara O'Shea

Archive for the ‘Blogs’ Category

Summer Daze

Wednesday, June 29th, 2016

I’ll be taking the summer off from writing The Advice Column at The Daily Basics. Back in September! Enjoy the season!

Risky Business

Wednesday, May 18th, 2016

The most recent question for my advice column is…

Dear Samara,

I am a 28 year old and I work in a large commercial real estate firm in New York City. I have a dream job and am getting paid very well. There is guy at work that I am very attracted to and if I am reading the signs correctly, he likes me, too. Our flirting is exciting and I can hardly wait to see him every day. I know this sounds like high school, but my fear is that we will start dating, have a great romance and if it doesn’t work out or even if it does work out, how is it going to affect our jobs? I don’t think dating someone from my workplace is a great idea, but I don’t want to pass by the opportunity of dating someone this fabulous. Any ideas?


What says you about workplace romance? Is it worth the risk?

Can a Straight Man be in Love with a Gay Man?

Wednesday, April 27th, 2016

Dear Samara,

I am a gay guy in love with my straight best friend who has a wife and two kids. The thing is he is in love with me too, but he is straight. How do we figure this out? Can a guy be straight and in love with a guy?

Tangled up in You

I think no. What do you think?

I’m About to get Married and Terrified I’ll Never Receive Another “Come Hither” Look in my Life

Wednesday, April 13th, 2016

Dear Samara,

I am about to get married. I love my fiancé, but something happened the other day that really bothered me. I was in a restaurant and I saw a really hot guy. Normally, I would get a look but I got nothing. It dawned on me that I might never be desired by another man again after marriage—even if it is just one of those thrilling one-off glances. How do I become okay with this outside of staying single?

Hit or Miss

At least she’s honest! My response is here.

What If His Parents Don’t Like Me?

Wednesday, March 16th, 2016

Hi Samara,

I am a 24 year old Hispanic woman from Texas. I met and fell in love with my boyfriend, Tom, two years ago when we were in grad school. We currently live in separate apartments in San Francisco. He has been offered a fantastic job in New York, where he is from, and wants to take it. We have decided to relocate and move in together.

The problem is he that is from a very conservative family. I’ve not met them yet, but he has told me a couple of stories. It sounds like his parents might be narrow minded and I fear that they will be prejudiced against me because my family is from El Salvador and I definitely I look Hispanic.

Tom says they won’t have any problem with my race, but I am very scared they will not accept me. I’m not even sure they will like that we plan on living together. If they don’t like me, does that mean I would break up with Tom? Both of us are committed to each other, we are soulmates and partners. We have talked about marriage, but we have so much we want to do before then. Right now we just want to be together and build our careers.

My parents haven’t met Tom either but I have told them about him. They are happy I am with someone nice. I haven’t told them that we are moving in together and I don’t think they are going to be very happy about that as we are Catholic. But I would rather take one thing at a time.

Any thoughts?

Thank you,


What would you do? Here’s my advice.

I Broke Up with BF 6 Months Ago. Am I Ready to Start Dating?

Friday, January 8th, 2016

Dear Samara,

I lived with my boyfriend for three years and moved out last June. This is my first holiday alone ever. My family lives in New York and I live in Oregon. Work will prevent me from going home over the holidays.

I have been invited to a few parties and I want to go so I don’t get totally depressed. Since I haven’t dated for a while, can you give me some holiday dating tips? I mean, are lonely people easier marks for guys who just want a fun time? I am nervous about dating again, I hope I have not forgotten how, but I think I am ready.

Read my response here.

Vanished: A Year’s Worth of Blogs

Tuesday, December 15th, 2015

You’ll notice that the blog directly below this one is from June 2014. My website was down in October of this year for a few days and when it came back up, a year’s worth of blogs had vanished. Fortunately, those blogs were not lengthy. I’ve stepped back from blogging in the past few years. Most of my 2014/2015 blogs were links to my advice column at The Daily Basics. While it was unfortunate to lose my random musings for the past year and a half, I would have been much more upset had I lost all that I wrote from 2007 – 2012.

I write this as an explanation for why it appears as though I haven’t blogged in so long.